If This Was My Last Blog Post

At some point of our lives, we all have to die. It’s a part of life. We can not avoid it, nor prevent it. There’s no escaping the truth. What if you have been given a chance to speak before you vanish in the surface of the earth? What would you say?

If this was my last blog post or my last day that I will live, I want to say thank you…

First of all, I want to thank God for giving me an opportunity to live my life to the fullest in these past years, even though I’m still 14 years old. I want to thank Him for giving me a good life filled with family and friends. I also want to thank Him because He sent His own Son to save us from sin.

Thank you, Mom and Dad. Thank you for being there for me. Thank you for accepting me just the way I am. Thank you for not getting angry at me and being understanding. Thank you for giving me a life, a simple life. One filled with happiness and love. Thank you for all the hard work and patience that you gave us. Thank you for sacrificing your time and happiness just for our own.

Thank you, my brothers. Even though you made fun of me, I just wanted to tell you that I love you both. Thank you for all the laughter we shared as siblings. Thank you for accepting me. Thank you or spending your time to play with me when I was a little girl. Simply, thank you for treating me as a good sister.

Thank you, my friends. Thank you or spending your free time with me. Thank you for listening to my problems. Thank you for helping me in my time of need. Thank you for accepting me despite my imperfect personality. Thank you for just being there for me. Thank you for sharing laughter and time with me. Thank you for supporting me in my choices that i made. I just wanted all of you to know that I am lucky to have you as my friends and I’m incomplete without you.

And if this was my last blog post, I also want to say sorry…

I’m sorry, Almighty Father. Forgive me for I have done wrong. I’m sorry for all the sins that I’ve committed. I’m not a perfect person. There are many things I wish I didn’t do but I will continue learning from what wrong I had done. I’m sorry that sometimes, I wish to die. I wished that I want to be vanish from earth but you made me think of the pros and cons so I want to thank you for that.

I’m sorry, Mom and Dad. I’m sorry that I have been a bad girl sometimes. I’m sorry that I talk back. I’m sorry if I disobey what you said to me. I’m sorry if I didn’t listen to what you’re saying. I’m sorry if I shouted at you. I’m sorry if you had sickness or headaches because of me. I’ll try not to do that again. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry…

I’m sorry, my brothers. I’m sorry for being a hot headed sister towards you two. I’m sorry, Kuya, for not listening to what you said. I’m sorry if I hurt you. I’m sorry if I hadn’t been a good sister figure for you, especially you, BG. I’m really sorry.

I’m sorry to you too, my friends. I’m sorry for not always listening to your problems. I’m sorry for lying to you. I’m sorry if I talk shit to you. I’m sorry if I am being a bad friend to you. I’m sorry for hurting your feelings. I’m sorry for the harsh words I spat on your faces. I’m sorry that I’m being bossy. I’m sorry if I shouted at you, hitting you, and slapping you. I’m sure you get the point. Friends, if you’re reading this right now, I know you have a smile on your face and I’m happy about that. At least, I made you happy when I am about to die.

Before I end this post, I just want to say that, I'm not perfect, I never tried to be. I've made mistakes. I've taken the easy way out. I've lied to my friends. I've hidden the truth so many times from so many people. I've hurt people, and I've even done it on purpose. I've left people behind. I've said things that I didn't mean. I'm no better than anyone, anywhere. I'm human. I have faults, and I'm not afraid to admit that. I want to change, but I won't. It’s because that's what we do. That's what we've always done. We list our faults like a grocery list, and we move on, expecting everything to somehow change itself. It never will. I will never change. I will never be perfect. I will always make mistakes. I'll, more often than not, take the easy way out. I will lie, hide the truth, hurt people, leave people behind, and say things I don't mean for the rest of my life. If that’s who I am, then so be it. You just have to accept me just the way I am.

And that ends this blog post…